It is the 3rd time one of my boys turn into his 12th year and as in past experience, I anticipate the true colours to show. The testosterone level hikes up, voice starts to break and you'll notice the guy doesn't listen to you much anymore.
Retaliation begins when you repeat your requests to turn off the TV for the 3rd time;
or when you ask perhaps a little too persistently whether he wants some vegetables during dinner time.
He would roar a strong answer to get his message across !
Overnight, he has turned from a sweet obeying kid to a tween bent on getting his voice heard.PERIOD.
I think, to the boys growing into tween/teens:
1) Having their voice heard is the way they prove to the family that they have grown even if it makes them sound disrespectful or uncool.
2) They dislike being told to do this/that.Their decision counts.
I am getting a lot of the above of late, so I have to remind myself to
1) Continue to stress to him that one does not have to raise one's voice and sound disrespectful. And to tell him that I will respect his answer and let's abide by the rules, firmly. Be prepared with more retaliation but tell him that you are not to be drawn into a battle of outburst. And wrap with a SMILE.
2) Plan the tasks with them to be completed with a deadline and avoid the telling part, but instead ask if they have got them done.
Most important, need to remind myself to take his first answer seriously. But you know, as mothers do, we try hard to squeeze in a bit of our wishes, and feel accomplished if the guy complies.
Should have been 3rd time wiser parenting a tweenager, yet still requires a lot of resilience, practice and self-reminder. As each boy is so different, every encounter is a new challenge.
PATIENCE is the keyword. The SMILE is to avoid anger building up.
I am in a battle of words right now with one of my boys as I write this !
As one of my friends encouraged, "Enjoy them!"
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment